Taoist Teachings on How to Face Betrayal and Let Go with Grace

Should You Curse Someone Who Hurt You? A Taoist Reflection on Karma and Release

A few days ago, someone from the U.S. contacted me. He asked if I could help him curse someone who had hurt him deeply—far more than just emotionally.

I understood his pain. I truly did.

But I told him gently: No. I won’t help you. And I hope you won’t ask anyone else to do it either.

Let me share why.

🌒 A Story from My Practice: When C Came to Me

Years ago, I helped a client—we’ll call her N—find love through a spiritual consultation. She became a loyal friend.

One day, she introduced me to a girl named C, who came with a very specific request:

“I know what you can do. Name your price. I want you to curse someone. I want him to suffer.”

As soon as I saw C’s photo, I felt something heavy—her aura was likely a deep black, thick and suffocating.

She told me her story.

C came from a wealthy family in Jiangsu, China. She was attractive, independent, and picky with relationships. Then she met a man at a party who swept her off her feet.

He had charm, a tragic backstory (his father was once a high official now imprisoned), expensive cars, designer items, and what seemed like emotional depth.

She believed he was “the one.” They even planned to marry.

🩸 But Then She Discovered the Truth

After posting pictures online, people began whispering.

It turned out the man was a professional male escort—a “duck” in Chinese slang—who catered to wealthy, often older women. While dating C, he was living with a divorced woman in Shanghai and still supporting a wife and child in his hometown.

When confronted, he vanished.

C was devastated. Her family was humiliated. She was mocked privately: “So proud all through college, only to be tricked by a duck.”

She broke down emotionally. Couldn’t leave the house. She was lost.

⚖️ “I Want Revenge. Deep, Real Revenge.”

She begged me to curse him.

I listened quietly. Then I asked:

“Do you still want any connection to this man?”

“No,” she said.

“Do you want any emotional ties left?”

She screamed, “No! I hate him! He’s my greatest shame.”

Then I explained:

Every human connection, no matter how painful, is like a web. As long as you feed it—through love, hate, shame, or longing—it stays alive. If you curse him, you’re weaving the web tighter.

You won’t be free in this life—or the next.

She fell silent.

🪙 Curses Are Contracts with Darkness

Cursing someone is like signing a deal with a demon. You give something up—usually lightness of heart, future joy, or clear karmic space—in exchange for pain.

Yes, I’ve been tempted before. I’ve been hurt too.

But my teacher stopped me. And I thank him every day.

Had I taken that path, I don’t know what kind of person I’d be now.

🌀 Karma Doesn’t Keep Score—It Keeps Records

C said, “But he hurt me first. I’m only getting even.”

I told her:

The universe doesn’t track fairness. It tracks vibration.

A kind act adds light. A harmful act adds weight.

You can’t balance out cruelty by doing good later. You carry both.

Some people live long because of their good deeds—yet suffer illness because of hidden harm they’ve done.

If you really want to minimize the damage of a toxic bond, here’s what you can do:

🌿 The Two Paths to True Release

First, cut the cord completely. Don’t just avoid him—stop hating him. Refuse to carry his shadow. Let the whole thing dissolve.

Second, open yourself to new love. C had a promising romantic period coming up. I offered to help her align with it. She accepted. Eventually, she found a good man.

She never contacted me again. Maybe she didn’t want to be reminded of her darkest days. That’s okay.

I was genuinely happy for her.

🧠 Final Thought: Cursing Is a Symptom of Powerlessness

Dark energy preys on people with intense resentment.

In Buddhist terms, it’s called the Five Poisons—greed, anger, ignorance, arrogance, and doubt. In Western thought, we call them the Seven Deadly Sins.

When one of these emotions overwhelms you, you become a doorway for something much darker.

Taoism teaches: Let the cycle pass. Trust the natural law.

善恶终有报，天道有轮回。
All actions bring results. The Tao always returns.

So ask yourself—not whether someone deserves a curse.

But whether you deserve freedom.

Letting go is harder than revenge.

But it’s also the most powerful form of healing.

—Wuyu